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Celebrating love and friendship

How your feel in your body hearing the word “love”?

What about Valentine’s day? Do you like it, hate it, or have no feelings about it?

Yesterday, I was talking with Pete about Valentine’s Day. He said doesn’t like it so much. I kind of like it and I like even more the Finnish version. In Finland, we call it Friends’ Day, a day for celebrating friendship and love, other than romantic love.

I like celebrating and cherishing friendship and all the important people in my life. I like also celebrating romantic love, and I like celebrating it with Pete on a daily basis with words, touching, cooking for each other, doing fun stuff together, planning fun stuff, working together (which can be fun, too!), being lazy together, calling and skyping when we’re apart, watching movies, talking about movies and books, searching for rugs, lamps, etc. for our Amsterdam home, relaxing in the cabin in Finland and going to sauna.

I like talking about things that we are worried or angry about, expressing anger, sadness, appreciation, lust and joy to each other. This morning I did get a message from Pete saying “Happy Valentine’s Day, my love!” (I’m currently in Finland and Pete in Amsterdam). I called him and instructed him to look in my clothes drawer to find his Valentine’s card and a box of Budapest chocolate that I’d left for him there.

We got married just over half a year ago. And we celebrated that anniversary with a lovely vegetarian surprise dinner at Betty’s in Amsterdam (which was a wedding gift from two friends Arjen & Marjolein) and had a party with Amsterdam friends.

I enjoy being married to Pete. No, actually I love being married to Pete. Being with Pete is for me fun and easy and joyful. And, at times, it’s also tough for me: I’m facing my fears, insecurities, wishes and demands, clinginess and (at many times, unreasonable) anger. During the time we’ve been together, I judge I’ve become quicker at recognising and talking about the unpleasant stuff. While my mind might resist, my body already knows that good comes out of sharing and taking.

What do you fear the most in love? What do you want the most? What kind of a friend and lover do you want to be?

Thank you for being part of our journey of love, healing and growing!

Love for every day of the year,

Tuulia Syvänen

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