"Clear and firm boundaries and doing your own work!"This is what I answered when a…
Don’t be like Tom
| He fell asleep on the bus and missed his stop. The old man got off at a bus depot in the middle of nowhere. He felt lost. It was already dark. A sweet couple walking home from a theater show saw him and took him to their home for the night. They chatted and he met the lively daughter too. He was thrown out of a bus for lack of a valid bus ticket and was left in the middle of fields in the wind. He started to walk on a quiet countryside road and was picked up by a van full of merry Ukrainians. He was invited to an Ukrainian Birthday party with singing, lots of food and booze. Ladies wore colorful traditional clothes. The room was full of laughter and loud voices. He was old and determined. Shaky. Walked slow. He looked at a little note book in his pocket to check the right bus number and schedule. All written down in his neat handwriting. No mobiles, no planes. Not even trains. Just a man on a mission with his bag. Tom used old paper map to make his way from John O’Groats, the most northerly point of Britain, to the most southerly point of Britain – Land’s End in Cornwall England. The same way he arrived there with his young wife decades earlier. Now he traveled through the whole country with many local buses, small roads and highways. Tom was indeed very determined. I notice tears, tightness in my body and a smile witnessing Tom’s journey. He was old and this was his last chance to visit home he had not visited since he left in his early 20’s. Tom was 80 and sick. Tom traveled on busses on his old route. He struggled emotionally and physically. He was even hospitalized at one point after passing out in a bus. He escaped the hospital. He became a social media phenomena: people taking pictures of the bus man and following his journey. Him not knowing any of that. Many strangers helped him along the way. All of this made a good movie. The movie is called The Last Bus and it is starred by the very good Timothy Spall. I especially remember him from the great movie Secrets and Lies directed by Mike Leigh in 1996. (I recommend that for you!) My thinking is thought: do I postpone important things and leave them to the last minute? Those talks and meetings that actually matter? Those travels that are important? My message to you is: don’t be like Tom. Don’t leave things too late. ⏳ Do the things you want to do now. Talk with your parents before they die. Tell your siblings, aunties, uncles and grandparents what you appreciate them for. ❤️ You don’t know when it is all of a sudden too late. The main message I want to give to you is: dare to speak up. Dare to take action. Dare to take care of yourself in the form of having honest talks with the important people in your life. For your sake. Do the travels you want now. Try that climbing, hiking, paragliding, tango dancing, glass painting or whatever it is for you. Rather make a mess when talking about things which have not been said than stay silent forever. When you speak up something is already shifting in you. In you body. If you need support for your talks or just enjoy being in a group of other truth tellers, come to a workshop! Or bring your loved one to Family & Friends retreat. You can do the work there together. ❤️ Talk to your mom and dad. However scary that might be. And if they are already dead you can still talk to them – it is just a bit of a different experience to talk to a grave or photograph. And still powerful. What have you been postponing that is hampering your happiness? Love, Tuulia (& Pete) PS: Do not leave the booking for your 8-Day Intensive to the last minute! The transformative 8-Day Intensive takes place 16-24 May in our new retreat center in Parkano Finland. |
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