"I really like leading the Couples retreats, Family & Friends retreat and 8-Day Intensives", I…
This could be the most powerful five minutes of your life ❤️
What I often propose to couples and families is to set up five minute sharing.
Or at least four times a week.
You might wonder: why is this so important?
In my experience we all yarn to the heard and seen.
And in the busy every day life it is easy to not really listen and share. And thus start to feel distant from loved ones.
It is soooo easy to get caught in practical things rather than stopping and really listening.
I have definitely done that.
Being busy and not really hurting the other.
And not checking in what is alive in me.
How I feel.
What is important to me right now.
And sharing that with a the other.
Here are the instructions:
5 minutes sharing with Active listening
Set a timer to 5 minutes. (or if you prefer you can also allocate 7 or 10 minutes to each person)
First person shares whatever is in their mind about for example what has happened that day, how they are doing, what is important to them, what is troubling, or puzzling to them or what they are happy, worried or sad about.
When you share, notice the sensations in your body, your emotions and thoughts.
Use as much as possible “I” language rather than “you” language (for example “I feel sad” vs “you made me feel sad”)
After 5 minutes switch roles and the second person shares and again after 5 minutes the third person shares.
Listening: listen actively and notice your sensations in your body, your emotions and thoughts. Listen without questions, advice or comments.
Afterwards you can all share how the experience was for you and what was arising in you while sharing and listening and if you all agree, ask questions or give comments.
Agree a timeline for the conversation, ideally 20-30 minutes maximum. Finish with telling the others one thing you appreciate them for right now.
Will you try this out if you have not tried it?
Will you share with me how it was for you?
In case you want to practice this and other things with your partner you are warmly welcome to join us in the Couples retreat in Syvilla
There is another way to spend five minutes also in a very useful way: that is the 5 minutes feeling sorry for yourself when you are feeling low and shitty.
Giving full permission to feel sorry for yourself.
Only for five minutes though.
I wrote about that earlier this year.
And I am curious: What is alive in you right now?
Tuulia & Pete
In case you have been in workshops or retreats with us before check this out:
In the beginning of November we will host again Practitioner and Advanced retreat in our new retreat center Syvilla!
For five days we will dive into honesty practices and meet old & new friends.