“Today, I choose to be with you.” This is what Pete and I say to each other daily. We got married earlier this month and we want to continue this practice. Even though we made a commitment in front of family and friends to be with each other, we also recognize that every day and each moment is different and new. We are dynamic and ever-changing.
Our commitment is about us wanting to be together long-term, to be there for each other, to love and have fun, and to express ourselves if anger, fear or doubts arise in us. Early in our relationship when we started to tell each other that we choose to be together that day, we took time to make a conscious choice that being together arose from a wish and freedom rather than a must or routine. Though we’ve made a long-term commitment, we haven’t offered any guarantees. We don’t know how life will pan out. So, what we’re saying is essentially: “Let’s enjoy the here and now; let’s live now; let’s love today.” Since we don’t know about tomorrow, next month, next year, there’s little point in worrying about matters that are out of our control.
Our wedding celebration took place in the most beautiful place in world: my cabins by Lake Vaavu in the woods in Finland. One of the many things I love about Pete—my husband—is how he also loves spending time at the lake, heating the sauna, rowing the boat, being lazy on the deck and doing many little chores like chopping firewood, carrying water and emptying the outhouse buckets. I’m so happy I can share the best place for me with Pete and our Radical Honesty friends and family in workshops. And this month for the celebration of our love.
I was happy to see so many of our Radical Honesty family joining us for the sunny and windy day. Pete rowed me in the boat into a headwind and through choppy waters till we rounded a peninsula to the dock where our friends were awaiting us. That trip seems like a symbol of our relationship: though the wind may blow and the waters choppy and the route longer than planned, we can still reach where we want to go while having fun and learning something about ourselves along the way.
I’m happy right now. That’s plenty.
Close your eyes. Take a moment to feel your body. Take a moment to feel and think what is good in your life. What do you love? What do you want more of?
I wish you love and joy, just now in this moment.